[WORLD ONE] SPEED DATING EXTRAVAGANZA

[spellbindmods]

Who: Participating coven members
Where: The Palai marketplace
When: Day 49
Open/Closed: OTA

[ Any and all who are in the marketplace will find that there is suddenly a mysterious barrier around the marketplace (that may be eerily familiar to some) -- specifically one large portion of the marketplace with a large number of tables and chairs, perhaps purposefully set out for nefarious reasons.

A few Palai are ushering coven members to chairs, and everything seems about normal. As normal as the Palai can be when they're putting on a show anyway. It's not until a sizable portion of the coven members are seated (and also supplied with breadsticks and small shrimp), that things get a bit more bizarre.

Thanks to the power of the Eltos, a small band of energy keeps coven members stuck to the chair (magic can interfere, of course), but that's not the end of it. On each table, next to those delicious smelling breadsticks and shrimp, is a bowl of scraps of papers. Every five minutes, a strip of paper will pop out from the bowl.

If you ask the Palai, they'll be inclined to explain speed dating to you. Asking questions, getting to know a person, then being shimmied off to the next potential mate -- this is made possible by Elto magic yet again, through flying chairs that transport their holder to a new table at standard intervals.

The Palai are extremely invested in this exercise? Will you let them down? ]

[ OOC: In the spirit of speed dating, each character will have a top level. All who want to respond to this top level can with questions from this post, but the threads have to end at 10 comments from each character. After this last tag, the characters can be assumed to have been whisked to a different potential match. You're free to have characters make up their own questions, interact with Palai serving food, etc. ]

Comments

[apatheia]

[2B listens patiently to the explanation on "speed dating," although she's confused as to why they want her to participate since obviously an android can't reproduce. Nevertheless, she's stuck in one of the chairs, still not particularly interested in trying out food after seeing what happened the last time the Palai served food to them.

Well, if the purpose is to ask questions, she has a few of her own she wants answered. Particularly:]

If this is speed dating, what is regular "dating"?

[splinten]

You and the person you're interested it in or romantically partnered with participate in various activities. The intention is to get to know each other in initial stages, then strengthen or reinforce the bond in later stages.

[It's practically from one robot to another.]

[potentite]

[Jake almost jokingly offers to show her but he realizes 1) if she doesn't know what a date is then she might take it seriously and 2) he can't handle romance right now. So. Though she really is pretty, so he goes with a different joke:]

Are you sure you want to know? You might have suitors lining up once you do. [But since it was just a little ice breaker...] Dates are um... to find someone compatible with you. Romantically. Um, though, even once you're going steady with your sweetheart, dates are fun.

[thatdamnknight]

[explain dating? okay, sure. that's nice and simple and nothing having to do with actually taking part in these godawful speed dating shenanigans. not to mention, someone lacking the knowledge of what dating is deserves to know when they're forced to participate in something similar.

yup, flynn's more than happy to explain.]

Regular dating involves two people doing a variety of activities over a longer period of time to determine whether or not they're compatible as a couple and if they wish to pursue a long-term partnership.

[deem]

[This bizarre game of flying magical chairs and awkward conversations finally cuts him some slack. 9S might feel a little less put off, if only because opportunities to help 2B are ones he is, of course, always eager for]

From what I hear, it's people doing stuff they enjoy and spending time together.

[Granted this is the blind leading the blind...]

So it's less expedited? [He thinks?] Something like that... I guess the Palai don't understand why we shouldn't be roped into this.

[drizzle]

Regular dating is like this except more voluntary -- you get to choose your partner and activity.

[A slight pause as she thinks about it a little more.]

...hopefully. I've never exactly dated. I can only speak on second hand experience.

[lalliho]

Worse.

[BA DUM TSHH

anyway you see to not be eating, he'll just go ahead and take care of that for you, mmmm]

[bulletbiter]

[ Julius might fall into the 'actually attractive' category due to having good genes and his inherited habit of making himself meticulously presentable - but those aren't just things one do for 'speed dating'. Keeping oneself clean is more of a courtesy to others who have to share your space. ]

I'm not inclined to embarrass both of us. If there's no penalty, I suggest we take this time to rest.

[ There's food. He could use a short nap. ]

[actus]

[ this is fine. he likes eating. ]

What's your favorite food, then?

[ just to keep the conversation going from an outsider's point of view. since julius isn't taking this seriously, there's no real reason to give him strange and peculiar questions and answers, so he reaches for another breadstick and keeps sibling. ]

[talim]

[ jude — flushed an interesting shade of red not just because this entire situation is terrible but because this is julius, someone he's been getting to know rather well and has now been quite literally thrust onto an actual date with — mulls this over. the last thing he is is tired. if anything, he's restless. ]

... I mean, there's nothing wrong with a little friendly conversation, right? No need to be embarrassed. We both know this is ridiculous.

[ his poor face says otherwise. jude's still not sure whether he'd have rather gotten a stranger or not. as long as he can get julius to agree with him, then this is okay, right? ]

[dragoness]

You can sleep sitting up?

[ ... that's not even close to what he meant. ]

please pretend like i was on time...

[pussywhips]

[ It might be a little obvious that Ann isn't really enjoying this whole speed dating business, at least judging by her tense shoulders and unhappy frown. At least she's acquainted with her partner this time, she supposes, though she can't decide if that's better or worse—either way, she can't help but think this is all very weird and embarrassing. ]

Huh? Rest? [ ...Okay, so she's a little caught off guard by that. But, hey... at least he seems just as loath to do this as she does, so that's nice. ]

Like, take a nap or something?

[mech_and_mutt]

[Come for the food, stay because your butt is magically glued to the seat. Well, at least one-on-one was better than that whole three-pronged thing they were doing before. ...Red just wished he could have had a minute to adjust his tail before his posterior was fixed in place.

Oh, and that they'd stop bringing up that whole 'mate' thing. Because if he picked up anything from glance around the room, he wasn't the only one who was left irritated and uncomfortable from it. But at least that meant he wouldn't be paired off with someone going into this trying to actually find one... right?]

Gotta be honest, I'm just here to eat somethin' other than kelp.

[...but as long as they were sitting around, maybe he could make things a bit less awkward by asking the important questions.]

...Magic or tech?

[drizzle]

[Uncomfortable and annoyed should be the standard feeling everyone in the area could agree in unison over, but Nike's feelings were a lot more complicated -- she was starving and feeling heartbroken over being tricked by a group that reminded her of a lizard version of her family.]

...I got them to promise to bring me a bowl of my favorite soup. It should be here soon.

[Since she was just recently switched, and yet her gaze was on the hands over her lap. That is until his question caught her interest.]

Tech? What's that?

[dragoness]

[ when eliza's first pushed down into her seat, she doesn't care too much. they can pair her up with anyone they want, it's not like she's going to actually follow up with any of them, pfft. personal relationships are for chumps!!!!

what she does see right off the bat is: can you guess my weight? or are you a virgin? ]

What the hell kind of question is that?! [ and, looking at the person who's just been placed across from her: ] Don't take that as an invitation!

[ as the event progresses, she'll gradually get bored........... and when eliza gets bored, bad things happen. if she sees someone she recognizes, she'll shift into her saber class, and the bikini armor that comes with it — especially if that person before seemed Uncomfortable with her trendy armor. other times, she'll snatch up all those embarrassing questions for herself and fire them off. or worse.

dare you talk to a dragon when she's bored?? ]

[sealeted]

[Hakuno stares.

She stares, wide-eyed and silent, just drinking in... everything. Every cutely pointed fang in that snarl, each tightly curled talon in those dainty fists, each note in that shrill refusal. Hakuno drinks it all in, and slowly a warm, relieved smile spreads over her face.]

...I see. Then, I'll ask something else that I want to know even more, then. Have you been well, Elizabeth?

[drizzle]

[The moment she was taken into another table, there was one thing she did not expect to ever happen to her: have someone yell at her without warning. She was already feeling uncharacteristically low and conflicted over the entire ordeal that she didn't dare look at anyone in the eye until now.]

That should be my question, not yours! Since I didn't ask any to begin with!!

[And just to show she wasn't kidding about her confusion, she'll ask with a louder tone than the other girl did to her.]

What the hell kind of question is that?!

[Even her "that" had a bold and underline, she wins the first point!]

[yancat]

[Oh, it's the weird dragon girl who likes singing. You know, Jumin never really caught her name, but at least he already knows her, which is approximately eighty percent better than being with a stranger.

He clears his throat.]

I wasn't going to. Let's talk about one of my favorite topics instead.

Yes, let's talk about my beloved Elizabeth.

[cadventuretime]

Ooh, speed dating? Score!!

[Rather than wait for the explanation, the green-skinned zombie lady plants her butt onto the seat and has the biggest grin on her face.]

Hi there, good-lookin'! I'm Rottytops, or just Rotty if you're feeling friendly, and I just want to pick your brain a little. Maybe over coffee if this whole talking thing works out.

Or especially if it doesn't!

[mech_and_mutt]

Look, Rotty-- that whole 'brain' thing you keep doing? It just sounds really wrong. It was kinda funny at first, but...

[...but now it's not making him want to even TOUCH the shrimp cocktail. And after a few days of kelp this and kelp that, that was an impressive feat.]

What is it with you and brains, anyhow?

[teratias]

...But I'm not--!!!

[Not ready? Not sure about any of this? Waver's attempt to fend off being very politely directed to a chair. His face goes bright red. He doesn't date! The idea always seemed like a fantasy that was much too far away. And now...

...he has no idea how to do this. He covers his face with both of his hands, dying both inside and out.]

I don't even know where to start.

[rootandbranch]

[he had better think of how to start quickly, though. his chair shifts with stomach-lurchng speed as the new dating sequence starts, and it ends up at a table across from... across from...

well, his potential date is tall, dark, and handsome. but possibly not in the way that he was expecting or hoping for.

Geir starts the conversation the way he's started every one of these speed dates, his fine social sense flawlessly bridging the gap between human and dragon:]

Did you want that food?

[nailed it.]

[lalliho]

[Lalli sits up hissing and slapping, but he's immediately pushed back into his seat and cheerfully reprimanded for fighting against this lovely activity he of course wants to participate in! Love is great!

Love is horrendous if this is a requirement, and he knows there's a lot of pain that comes with it in general, so he tries to get up once more. This time, just after being put in place, he's whisked up by magic and...decides to stop trying to escape before the metaphorical pain is replaced by a physical one. These weird lizards might just break his neck, they're so insistent...

Well. He's snatching up a breadstick and grumpily chewing on it. Good luck.]

I'm not dating you.

[wingfic]

[They are breadstick twins. Crabbily eating breadsticks.]

No one wanted to date you.

[drizzle]

[Speed dating was a word Nike was all too familiar with on the account of having two older sisters with boy crazy tendencies, even if one sister complains over the other being too overly picky on a date to their liking. As much as the idea had her feeling curious as a small child -- her two older sisters beimg between six and nine years older thab her -- she knew better about it as a teenager. It was only unfortunate she made the mistake of being allowed to be seated by the gracious hosts after promise of all she can eat without charge, she trusted the lizard folk on their word, only to encounter the only meal to be breadsticks and shrimp.

Needless to say, after her heart has been broken via breaking their promise, Nike began to throw the greatest fit of all fits! She was screaming her frustration out at everyone, she had attempted to walk out with her chair stuck on her, to break her chair by slamming as much of her body weight as possible to fall over, tried to use the wind to tear her chair into pieces (and failed), and had tried to injure herself enough to be excuse by attempting to slam her head at the table in continuously, only to have the Palai decide to move her away from the table by allowing it to float on its own (which helps calm her down by the surprise).

After the Palai apologize and plea for her to go along with it willingly -- because they never want to see her hurt herself again -- was enough to placate Nike's rage. She didn't have the heart to reject them after showing their sincerity to her, but it left her feeling more than irritated and conflicted about it.]

....why are you forcing our hands like this? It isn't right....

[The Palai will simply explain the objective of speed dating as a response. Nike knew better than to waste time asking more questions. With elbows on the table -- after being scooted to the table after promising not harm herself again -- a pair of hands will hold her forehead as her gaze is on the table.]

Sorry, but can you eat on your own instead? Whatever meal in front of me is yours'. I'm not in the mood for this right now.

[actus]

I already had my body weight in breadsticks.

[ it's said with a casual shrug and he definitely isn't going to force the "play-pretend" reading of the questions. she seems far, far too perturbed by this entire scenario. rightfully so, of course. this entire matchmaking evening has been quite Extra. ]

I don't think anyone's taking this serious, if it helps.

[doublesharp]

[Listen, it's not like making new friends is a bad thing by any means, but this? Rather than straighten up and face the facts, Riku's biting his lip and trying to figure out how to start some sort of conversation.

Don't mind him as he digs through the bowl and opens a few of the slips of paper, occasionally turning just the slightest bit pink before quickly shoving one back where it came from.]

Ahhh, why'd they have to go and make things awkward by calling it dating?!

[Is he purposely missing the point, or is it going straight over his head?]

[actus]

[ ... entirely missing the point. akira can't help the look of amusement that dawns his features for a hot second. he quickly steels his expression back into one of indifference and reaches in to grab a piece of paper for himself. ]

Ah... what's your favorite body part of your partner.

[ please don't say that with such a straight face, akira. ]

[nockpoint]

[ your partner, sitting on the other side of the table is a little odd. he's refusing to talk, and also, he happens to be a sizeable, and fluffy cat. why is a cat at speed dating? well, see... uh. palai aren't familiar with mammals, i think. if it's got fur and walks and shit, well. gotta belong with the rest of those magic people, you know? and it's so lonely, that should be fixed too! there's zero evidence this is an animal.

also one of them heard him swear. (nothing quite like a cat saying "shit" to make you think he's people!) it picked him up and carried him in here, and sat him down. let's roll, ask the questions, refuse to answer them, cause chaos because we're too stubborn to admit we have an embarrassing power.

"excuse me sir, are you aware that you are a cat"

( note to servants: as a cat, archer cannot be identified as a fellow servant, oh thank god. he'd have to pull a lancer otherwise, the shame'd be too much. ) ]

[dragoness]

[ ...

...


...




look, she might have horns and a tail, but she's not a furry. why is she here, edison should be here. ]

[enflame]

( Holy shit, this is not what he bargained for when he came out here to get food. Well -- there is food, but everything else is extremely no bueno.

Emil shoos away the Elto that is trying desperately to talk to him about freaky ass words like ~mating~ in an effort to focus on his breadsticks. At least he knows what these are, and the shrimp don't smell half bad.

Suffice to say, his main goal will be eating and not dating you, whoever you are. )

Ask the question if you want, ( He says this focusing on peeling the breading off of a shrimp, barely looking up but seeing the paper pop out from his peripheral. ) but you can find food at another table.

( This is the only highlight of this for him, don't ruin his evening. )

[teratias]

I...was not going to do that. Or eat the food, since those stupid pastries made everyone's powers go weird again.

[Waver can't even have a good time because he doesn't trust the food. But he does remember Emil and them both getting huffy with each other, so there is that.]

Did your friend ever end up waking up?