Lalli Hotakainen (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lalliho) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
spellbinders2017-09-01 12:13 pm
lalliho) wrote in spellbinders2017-09-01 12:13 pm
Entry tags:
when everything's made to be broken [open.]
Who: Lalli Hotakainen and ????
Where: Aimintas places.
When: over the week, days 54-57? Ish?
Open/Closed: so open, man.
[ A - MEDITATION. ]
[He's trying to practice mindfulness. It's hard even when you know what it is and the process, so Lalli's finding it almost impossible. His job is to be aware of everything -- every little crunch or rustle or hushed sigh of a predator. Even prey. He was to be one with the forest and all that came with it...or he would fail.
Now he needed to close his eyes and breathe deep. He needed to understand not the world around him, but himself. Why had he pushed his limits as if it was his only choice? Why had he shoved people away when he was afraid of being left alone? Lalli needed to get himself back under control before he destroyed himself and others.
Being able to flip the switch on his Qri-given magic would be a-okay, too.]
Hey. What's your coven ability?
[laziest-sounding interrogator ever...he's trying to be zen, okay!!]
[ B - RITUALS. ]
[He hasn't tended to his wounds. As far as he's concerned, having evidence for himself that he was actually around to help this time was...good. Calming. Besides, as a mage, he has far more important things to attend to.
The Palai don't follow the same gods or traditions as his people do, and it feels wrong to abandon those, but if he could swallow his pride and accept help from an idiot Icelandic mage, he can swallow it again and offer aid where he can to these wandering souls.
The rest of the clean up? ...Not much he can do there, with these twigs he calls arms, but feel free to try and boss him around or tend to his wounds when he's on break from death rites and stuff, or whatever.]
[ C - CUDDLEBUG. ]
[When you're typically repulsed by the human touch -- when every grab to redirect or secure you feels like a rough, deadly vice -- cuddling...does not come naturally to you. Lalli's left fidgeting and scratching at himself, picking apart the weak, fresh scabs forming over the battle's results, because something was off in a way it never had been before. If he'd longed to be held as a child like he wishes now, the memory had long since left him.
He's left with one very obvious conclusion he shares via the signet -- though he also says it aloud in case there's anyone in the immediate vicinity that can help him.]
I think something's wrong with me. Maybe I'm poisoned?
[...Heck. He needs to find Emil and make sure he's okay at least, but... Should he really expose him to this problem? Ugh, quieting fears is so hard.]
[ D - GIVE ME THE WILDCARD.]
[cough.]
Where: Aimintas places.
When: over the week, days 54-57? Ish?
Open/Closed: so open, man.
[ A - MEDITATION. ]
[He's trying to practice mindfulness. It's hard even when you know what it is and the process, so Lalli's finding it almost impossible. His job is to be aware of everything -- every little crunch or rustle or hushed sigh of a predator. Even prey. He was to be one with the forest and all that came with it...or he would fail.
Now he needed to close his eyes and breathe deep. He needed to understand not the world around him, but himself. Why had he pushed his limits as if it was his only choice? Why had he shoved people away when he was afraid of being left alone? Lalli needed to get himself back under control before he destroyed himself and others.
Being able to flip the switch on his Qri-given magic would be a-okay, too.]
Hey. What's your coven ability?
[laziest-sounding interrogator ever...he's trying to be zen, okay!!]
[ B - RITUALS. ]
[He hasn't tended to his wounds. As far as he's concerned, having evidence for himself that he was actually around to help this time was...good. Calming. Besides, as a mage, he has far more important things to attend to.
The Palai don't follow the same gods or traditions as his people do, and it feels wrong to abandon those, but if he could swallow his pride and accept help from an idiot Icelandic mage, he can swallow it again and offer aid where he can to these wandering souls.
The rest of the clean up? ...Not much he can do there, with these twigs he calls arms, but feel free to try and boss him around or tend to his wounds when he's on break from death rites and stuff, or whatever.]
[ C - CUDDLEBUG. ]
[When you're typically repulsed by the human touch -- when every grab to redirect or secure you feels like a rough, deadly vice -- cuddling...does not come naturally to you. Lalli's left fidgeting and scratching at himself, picking apart the weak, fresh scabs forming over the battle's results, because something was off in a way it never had been before. If he'd longed to be held as a child like he wishes now, the memory had long since left him.
He's left with one very obvious conclusion he shares via the signet -- though he also says it aloud in case there's anyone in the immediate vicinity that can help him.]
I think something's wrong with me. Maybe I'm poisoned?
[...Heck. He needs to find Emil and make sure he's okay at least, but... Should he really expose him to this problem? Ugh, quieting fears is so hard.]
[ D - GIVE ME THE WILDCARD.]
[cough.]
no subject
[Yes, he's getting hissy and pissy about being told he isn't pretty enough. What do you mean he failed at acting natural?]
Pshht. I said I'm fine. I'm doing something really important, Emil. You take a break.
[your work isn't important you're definitely not important never super duper important and an exception to his need to stay away from people cough]
no subject
I know... ( That he's doing something important. Maybe he wouldn't usually feel so stung, but the sharp contrast in his attitude pricks his sudden, vulnerable softness. Lalli had been so agreeable -- this isn't the worst barb, but the spiky tone is coming back. )
You're doing great stuff for them. Just don't push yourself if you don't feel up to it right now. I'm sure the Palai won't care if you wait 10 minutes to gather some energy. ( Yeah, yeah, he's fine. Just let him reassure his workaholic friend he doesn't have to keep going if he doesn't want to.
He tops off that reassurance with a hand to Lalli's shoulder, squeezing it slightly. )
no subject
So he was starting to calm down before he feels that hand clamp onto him with the amount of welcome as fire on ice. Like ice, he cracks, elbow swinging back into Emil, and he turns and jogs away a few steps. He needs this distance, he hasn't had enough of it, and all that touching is coming back to him in a horrible wave he needs to get away from.]
Don't -- [His eyes feel like they're burning, and he wonders somewhere in the back of his mind whether his glare is as intense as it feels to him. He's not sure if he wants it to or not. He really just needs to get away.] ...Fine.
[He'll take a break. It's a good opportunity to run.]
Don't wait for me. You've...done enough.
[MAYBE IF HE GOES REAL FAST HE CAN RUN AWAY FROM HIS FEELINGS AND THE PAST WON'T CATCH UP TO HIM HA HA, bye loser.]
no subject
Well. He had indeed told Lalli to take a break so he got what he wanted.
Emil can't talk until Lalli's gone, leaving him wide-eyed and barely getting a breath in with the speed of the exchange. He hasn't even put his hand down while he watches him sprint off into the distance.
...What the fuck just happened? )
Bye...? ( He says stupidly with no one around to hear him except a gaggle of lizards that are standing around gawking at the spectacle.
Emil's a little too stunned to process everything right now. Give him a few hours and he'll have a better grasp on how he feels. )