I put my faith into the leader-- [he pauses before correcting himself.] ...the former leader of the knights. Even when I doubted the orders he gave, I didn't question them and executed them as told. Numerous people suffered as a result, dear friends of mine included.

[he screwed up and blames himself entirely for everything that transpired. which is fair. had he not been the model obedient knight then surely things would've turned out differently than they had!]