The boy who becomes the man who kills Carta, kills him, offers this sacrifice. Grasping not at power, surging not with brutish rage, but yielding in quiet resignation to a deeper, unreachable misery.
Unreachable, always that, so why his body, doing as it will, instinctive and panicked flux -- at one breath on his haunches, crawling terror, and at the next, launched through the space between them, hands scrabbling for shoulder and face. The latter he holds as though it might break beneath his coarser touch, because it has, thumb swiping white against the blood, seeping. ]
Stop! Not like this, not you --
[ His voice may never be anything but gravel and torn up conflict, scrunched along with his face, with what again gathers in his eyes. ]
Not you.
[ Who else but him? He doesn't know, but not like this, not like this, not like this. ]
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The boy who becomes the man who kills Carta, kills him, offers this sacrifice. Grasping not at power, surging not with brutish rage, but yielding in quiet resignation to a deeper, unreachable misery.
Unreachable, always that, so why his body, doing as it will, instinctive and panicked flux -- at one breath on his haunches, crawling terror, and at the next, launched through the space between them, hands scrabbling for shoulder and face. The latter he holds as though it might break beneath his coarser touch, because it has, thumb swiping white against the blood, seeping. ]
Stop! Not like this, not you --
[ His voice may never be anything but gravel and torn up conflict, scrunched along with his face, with what again gathers in his eyes. ]
Not you.
[ Who else but him? He doesn't know, but not like this, not like this, not like this. ]